{"id":14468,"date":"2016-10-06T08:01:42","date_gmt":"2016-10-06T14:01:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lastbestnews.com\/site\/?p=14468"},"modified":"2016-10-06T08:01:42","modified_gmt":"2016-10-06T14:01:42","slug":"good-people-can-sometimes-be-abusers-too","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/montana-mint.com\/lastbestnews\/2016\/10\/good-people-can-sometimes-be-abusers-too\/","title":{"rendered":"‘Good’ people can sometimes be abusers, too"},"content":{"rendered":"

Human beings have a dual nature\u2014a dark and light side. Yet, we label those we like as \u201cgood,\u201d and those we dislike as \u201cbad.\u201d We often have problems believing anyone we label as \u201cgood\u201d could be guilty of domestic or sexual violence. We forget that a person can be \u201cgood,\u201d but still be capable of making bad choices that hurt others.<\/p>\n

It might easier to see this contradiction clearly in celebrities. It\u2019s hard to imagine the possibility that Hope Solo might have physically assaulted her half-sister and nephew. It\u2019s hard to imagine that Johnny Depp could have abused Amber Heard. It\u2019s hard to imagine because these are talented, successful celebrities who we\u2019d like to categorize as \u201cgood.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"BW\"<\/a>

Beth Wiley<\/p><\/div>\n

As hard as it is for us to imagine that celebrities could hurt other people, it\u2019s even harder to believe the people we know might be abusers. It\u2019s hard for us to imagine that the men and women in our county might be hitting their intimate partner. Or that they raped someone who knew and trusted them. Or that they use words to cut as deep as a sword against their family every single day.<\/p>\n

But domestic and sexual violence happens. And every act of violence is done by a human being. Those who commit domestic abuse don\u2019t fit a stereotype\u2014they can be nonprofit volunteers, drug addicts, business owners, teachers, alcoholics, law enforcement officials, spiritual leaders, or career-criminals.<\/p>\n

The hard truth is that anyone<\/em>\u00a0is capable of being an abuser and falling into a pattern of power and control.<\/p>\n

Human beings do unspeakable things to each other. There are not just victims and survivors\u2014there are those who choose to abuse. This choice does not necessarily make them monsters. Those who abuse may have been abused themselves or might not know what healthy relationships look like.<\/p>\n

However, this does not excuse their bad choices. It is never OK\u00a0to control, manipulate, hurt, or physically abuse someone else. As a society, we need to hold abusers accountable for the consequences of their bad choices through arrests, legal charges, time in prison and rehabilitation efforts, such as counseling or restorative justice.<\/p>\n

Everyone can make a difference in stopping abuse by being willing to recognize that \u201cgood\u201d people can do bad things. This October, which is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, I\u2019m asking you to stand with Domestic and Sexual Violence Services.<\/p>\n

Please, talk to your neighbors, your children, your school, your churches, your book club, your ski buddies, anyone and everyone\u2014start a conversation to help everyone realize that every day in our communities someone is abusing another human being. And help us make it clear that violence in any form is unacceptable.<\/p>\n

Beth Wiley is a violence prevention educator and communication coordinator at Domestic and Sexual Violence Services in Red Lodge.

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Human beings have a dual nature\u2014a dark and light side. Yet, we label those we like as \u201cgood,\u201d and those we dislike as \u201cbad.\u201d We often have problems believing anyone we label as \u201cgood\u201d could be guilty of domestic or sexual violence. We forget that a person can be \u201cgood,\u201d but still be capable of […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":115,"featured_media":14469,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[5056,4196,5055,5054],"class_list":["post-14468","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-montana","tag-amber-heard","tag-domestic-and-sexual-violence-services","tag-hope-solo","tag-johnny-depp","prominence-category-featured"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/montana-mint.com\/lastbestnews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14468","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/montana-mint.com\/lastbestnews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/montana-mint.com\/lastbestnews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/montana-mint.com\/lastbestnews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/115"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/montana-mint.com\/lastbestnews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=14468"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/montana-mint.com\/lastbestnews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14468\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/montana-mint.com\/lastbestnews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/14469"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/montana-mint.com\/lastbestnews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=14468"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/montana-mint.com\/lastbestnews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=14468"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/montana-mint.com\/lastbestnews\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=14468"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}